It was the last straw that gave me the courage to seek help; not knowing what was to come. Now, 3 years later I come to the realization that it was the greatest gift to myself. I understand now that the main reason for my depression laid in the fact that I had become a full atheist and not a good one at that. I was an angry and a bitter atheist preaching to others how there was no God. Having no clue what was going to happen, I met Guillermo with an open mind as I had nothing more to lose. Guillermo was kind, professional and most of all; trusting. It helped me keep to his strict diet and purging regiment that I would later find to be the cause of one of the most beautifully enlightening experiences. Mother Ayahuasca was kind and comforting as it was my first experience. There I felt her love and warmth as she entered into me. I broke down with tears I had never felt before as she comforted me by telling me that I was truly special. I felt God who I had abandoned; for the first time I heard the sound of God and it was beautifully peaceful. As I look back, I felt the first time was a lesson to let me know that God was there all along. I felt great joy and it gave me the assurance of his existence. I am sure that Guillermo was guiding me the whole way through my journey to make my experience safe and meaningful. I concluded my first experience vowing to be back for the second chapter. One and a half years later, I had the opportunity to meet myself and Guillermo once again. During that time, I found God had lifted me from a veil of darkness and I was able to feel that life was worth living. In my second Ayahuasca experience I learned two important things; there is great joy in life and the importance of gratefulness. As I immersed myself in gratefulness, I experienced uncontrollable joy as I felt Shiva dancing and protecting me through my journey into the cosmos. It was a one on one session with Guillermo and it was a powerful learning experience; I had once again felt that life was precious and worth experiencing, I had to experience more. My third experience was not too long ago. I had developed a very special bond with Guillermo as I could feel him lifting me up every time I felt the world’s issues pressing down on me. It was time again to learn more. Guillermo let me know that he had fresh Amanita muscaria and my inner child was too happy to find what was to come. It was the most intense session which lasted for 10 hours through the night, day and evening. Guillermo was instrumental in leading me through my journey. He advised me to look within and nudged me to repent. As I put my full trust into his message and did so, I felt the most incredible feeling of letting go of all accumulated sadness and suffering; it was at that moment I realized I had that inside of me. Letting go gave me the experience of enlightening clarity and with the knowing that everything including the universe was inside me. Tears of uncontrollable relief and a joy that surpassed the birth of my beautiful daughters orders of magnitude greater than I would have ever imagined. For the first time, I discovered myself within me. At that moment, I knew I made the Gods laugh in joy through my realization and I burst into the most incredible explosive laughter along side the Gods. For the longest time, I thought that the world is the way it is because the Gods where bored, or just experimenting with humanity. I was totally wrong. It is how it is because of the episodes of joy that I have experienced with God; and there is more, there is always more. Now that I’ve had the privilege to have a small knowing, I must and will continue to delve within so that I may continue in my journey of learning and laughing with God. I feel as though I have reached the summit of the greatest mountain looking down on myself and smiling back. I now realize why Guillermo does what he does. It is to experience glimpses of joyous understanding through helping others. I realized that he created the beautiful garden healing centre in majestic Lake Atitlan with an almost maniacal sense of passion which has cascading falls and the sounds of humming birds zooming by, all for that single moment of realization for each person. His passion and knowing is just magical and it is reflected in everything he does. This healing has had such great impact that it is rekindling my love and gratefulness for my wife and children. For the first time, I feel what love really is through what I can only say is my newly found engorged heart. I hope my message has touched you as Guillermo has touched me. I owe everything to Guillermo and I trust him with my all. Until the next chapter… With pure love, Joseph Tae K. Kwon
